Sunday, April 29, 2012

How To Successfully Set Up That First Date

Have you mastered the art of meeting the opposite sex? This is only the beginning. Once you have met a girl and you have really "clicked" with her it is time to begin the hard part: going from strangers to lovers.

Don't expect her to give you much help with this. The guy is the one who is expected to organize the first date, handle the scheduling of the time to meet with her, and guide the whole thing from beginning to end.

Worst of all, a woman will actually be looking for reasons not to date you.

Assuming you do successfully arrange a date, you may find she is not ready to kiss you or does not respond to your suggestions to meet again. Perhaps you will waste your time and money on a date that goes nowhere, but these tips will help.

Arranging the Date

You should always arrange your date over the phone, not by e-mail. Why? Even if you have been regularly e-mailing her up to this point, it can be frustrating to keep e-mailing back and forth in order to arrange a date, with all the suggestions and corrections that go with it.

Another point: when you make the effort to call and talk to her in person, it is more personal and it reassures her that you are truly interested. The extra contact will also make her feel more guilty if she tries to back out of the date, since she agreed to it verbally. It is much easier with e-mails to "forget," or to ignore them in the first place.

If she has a land line, be sure to call her at home rather than on her cell phone. She may take your cell call while she is out and about, and distractions may hinder her in remembering the day that she agreed to. She may not even have anything with her on which to write down the details.

Just because you do not arrange a date by e-mail that does not mean e-mail is out of the picture. If you have her e-mail address, you should send a follow-up message after the date letting her know that you are looking forward to seeing her at the agreed-upon time and place. This way, if any of the details are wrong, she will alert you to them.

Think things out before you call her. Suggest a certain time, day and place. This shows you have given some thought to the matter, and women love well planned out dates. it also shows you are decisive.

Too many men make the mistake of acting as if the woman is doing them a favor by accepting the date. They ask where they should meet and accept whatever she says. Avoid this.

Once you start dating, there will be much more give-and-take. For now, make the decision yourself (you will most likely be paying for it, after all).

Choose a time and place at which you will be most comfortable. The more familiar you are with the venue at which you go, the more confident you will appear.

A first date should take place in your territory, not hers. It should be at your favorite restaurant or bar. This will give you the advantage.

Keep in mind that she may not be able to accommodate the first day and time you propose. Issue your invitation several days in advance as women often do not like spur of the moment things. You do not know how busy her social calendar is, as you may need to fit your date in. She may even act as if she is very busy, just to give you the impression that she is a "hot commodity."

As important as proposing a date several days in advance is when you time your call. So that you don't become a "cold prospect" you should call to arrange a first aid know more than a week after you first meet her.

Keep in mind that the date and time you propose will signal your intentions. If you suggest meeting for drinks after work, it suggests that you want to start out cautiously and determine your level of rapport with each other before making a greater commitment. If you suggest dinner on a Friday or Saturday night, it implies that the evening may carry on into drinking, dancing and possibly even intimate relations.

On the other hand, if you arrange the date for Saturday or Sunday, it shows her that you are interested enough in her to want to spend a whole day in her company, and the date will be much more relaxed and activity focused.

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