Friday, December 21, 2012

Investigative Dating: Are They Really Qualified to Date You?

When a potential dating partner comes along you're giving your valuable time, your trust, and occasional gifts. If you're considering becoming more serious you should make sure that they are qualified to be a boyfriend or girlfriend. A potential dating partner should face the same scrutiny that any job candidate would. If you think that this is taking it a little far consider it nasty break up prevention. He could be So nice Steve today and Steve the Stalker six months from now. Terrific Traci can easily transform into Tire slashing Traci. But the restraining order can be avoided. When you hook up with someone you never can tell what is going to happen. Or can you?

No, even with 20/20 vision you can't see into the future. But what you can do is ask the right questions. Do what people do every day. When someone wants to hire for a job they almost always require a resume or application. In other words, when an employer is searching for someone who will be committed to a mutual relationship where both person's individual goals are met, they do some level of investigation. What they are looking for and what you are looking for in a dating partner are not so different.

Here are the things that should be required of every person you are considering dating on a long term basis.

Correct name, address, and phone number: Sort of goes without saying but believe it or not some people who get to know a person who primarily uses their nickname take too long to learn their legal name.

Objective statement: What does your potential dating partner want from the relationship? How do they envision going about partnering with you to get what you mutually agree you want from the relationship.

Work History: What is his or her history? How did the past relationships end? Did they all end up on a bad note? Recurring issues in their dating history could potentially be a predictor of the outcome of yours.

I once heard a well known person in the media proclaim that they are a "bum magnet". Remember if they seem to always attract bums, what is about them that always attracts bums? Avoid focusing on the bums and their flaws focus on the person you are considering dating.

References:

What do they think that their former spouses or dating partners would say about them?

Finally remember to always get STD status and sometimes even credit status

When you are dating remember to have fun, but ask questions. You can save yourself a lot of stress, heart break, and disappointment somewhere too soon down the line. You can be like a skilled journalist doing all of the necessary research to get to the heart of their story.

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