Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Why He Didn't Call Back After the First Date

If you're like most women, you've probably been in the following situation: you had a wonderful date or two with a guy. You connected, you talked all night, you really felt like something could blossom between you two. It seemed like everything was going great! And then... he never called. What do you do? Why didn't he want to see you again? There are handful of reasons he may have run off, and you should know what they are so that you don't make the same mistakes again!

Don't Smother Him So Early
Men are not horribly complex creatures when it comes to this subject. If a girl seems too aggressive, needy or overbearing, he will lose interest very quickly. If you call him several times after the first date, or send him a mini-novel via text message, he's probably not going to respond. Perhaps you just want to say goodnight, or tell him what a great time you had. Resist the temptation! If he's interested, he will call you. It may take him a few days, but you can't force a guy to like you. You can, however, push him away by seeming clingy after only one or two dates!

Don't Make Your World Revolve Around Him
Most guys are focused on themselves. You should do the same! He has a career and friends, he has hobbies, he likes to watch sports with the guys or read a good book by himself some nights. You need to be as independent as he is. Don't make him feel like you can't live without him right away - that can be a LOT of pressure on a man! When you first start dating, make sure that you have your own social life. Spend time with friends and exercise your hobbies. Make sure he knows that you are your own person and that your entire world does not revolve around someone you've only been dating for a week or two! This can be threatening to a guy and make you come off desperate, which is extremely unattractive. Let him come after you, don't just hand him your schedule and let him take over!

Don't Move Too Fast for Him
You're probably looking for something more than just a quick fling - and he might be too! The problem here is that a lot of women will start waving their commitment flags right off the bat. This can easily scare a guy away. Keep in mind that the first few dates are a getting-to-know-you period and that he's not sitting there eating is chicken parmigiana waiting for you to ask whether or not he wants to have children. Chat about your job, about your favorite band or ask him where he got his tie. Don't jump right into heavy topics like family, politics or marriage. These things will come in time, and bringing them up prematurely may just scare him off.

The point here is to stay casual on your first few dates. Men can get spooked by an aggressive woman very easily. You may know what you want, but he probably doesn't, and you can't fault him for that. Take time to get to know each other and then discern whether or not this is a relationship worth taking further. It will progress naturally if you give it room to.

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