Can't get a girlfriend? Maybe you should step up your flirting game. Why is flirting important? It's a tease. It's the sexual tension that stirs the relationship. It's playful and fun. It keeps you on your toes because you have to be funny and witty and create that spark. It also creates a want and need in her mind. She's flirting with you because it gets excited and it makes her want to be with you.
The truth is that most men have no idea how to flirt, and when they start flirting, they do it in a way that makes them lose their mystery. To get a girl, it helps to be a great flirter. It does take a lot of practice. With flirting you can't be be too subtle because your point might not hit its target or she will misread your intentions. If your flirting is not hitting the target it might be because you haven't done it enough or you haven't had enough practice. If you don't know how to flirt naturally, then you should definitely learn, because flirting should be fun not embarrassing.
Flirting does take time and you'll stumble a couple times, but with practice and learning from your mistakes you can develop a great flirt game. Once you get a hang on how flirting goes, it'll open up all kinds of doors for you. Now let's take a look at some steps to remember while you are getting your flirt game together.
The Laid Back Flirt
When you are being laid back, you're playing it cool and not looking desperate. You're giving off answers and responses that make you come off as being a level headed guy that can be funny as well. This makes women think they could feel safe around you. Point scored, you might end up leaving with her if she completely trusts you. Avoid being too obvious with how you flirt too. Don't say what is the most obvious thing to say when flirting. What does that exactly mean? For example:
NON-PLAYFUL WAY
Girl: I love pasta. It's my favorite / Guy: We should go out and eat some pasta sometime.
Could this work? Sure, but it's also an obvious answer, plus there is no playful banter or excitement with this.
BETTER WAY
Girl: I love pasta. It's my favorite / Guy: It depends. Is it Chef Boyardee? I can make a mean plate of some Chef Boyardee sometime.
This gives a little humor in the flirting. The guy can also open into "I can microwave you up a bowl sometime if you like". Asking her out on a date, but being funny about it.
Girl: I love pasta. It's my favorite: / Guy: How do you feel about making some pasta for people you just meet?
Again, some more banter and playfulness with this flirt.
Women love a good challenge, which is why it helps you to be laid back. Don't open up and talk her ear off. Keep them guessing on who you are. Be a puzzle that just has to be solved. If there is no challenge, there is no fun. If you are relaxed and come off as confident, all of the sudden you become sexier, more attractive and more intriguing.
Being Elusive
Be a mystery. Don't reveal yourself too much. Let them work at getting to know who you are. The one problem guys have while flirting is that they let the cat out of the bag. They reveal too much while they should be holding back for the girl to make all the moves. Let's say you are flirting with someone that seems to be into you. No need to rush into spilling over your whole life story. You already have their attention. Learn to be patient and let the conversation and playfulness come out.
It's going to take practice and won't happen over night. Sometimes you talk your head off because you are so bottled up inside. You have all these things to say, but no one to hear them then once you find someone into you, you talk and talk and talk. Hold back on those initial feelings and just have fun with it. Have fun with the idea that someone is playfully talking to you and enjoying it at the same time.
Put A Time Limit On
Timing is everything. If you don't notice the time limit on something it can hurt your chances. Depending on how the flirting is going don't flirt for too long. It will make you look needy. Going back to the point of being elusive, that's what you need to be. Have the appearance of having to be somewhere else or having to talk to someone else. If you flirt with her for too long then it might come across as you needing to talk to someone and she is just that person. You might end up scaring her off with all the neediness you displaying.
You have to be able to read the body language and the overall situation. If the flirting is going really well then you can either try and leave on a high note and get her name/number before leaving. Or continue to talk. If I find someone engaging then I'll keep up the conversation and talk until I feel it coming to an end. I try and get a name/number (if I want it) and then I leave the conversation.
Here's an interesting situation, let's say you meet at a party or a friends get together. You start flirting with someone and make a connection. You can always leave and then come back again because you know she's going to be around. It gives you the opportunity to walk around as well and find someone else to talk to. If you don't end up finding someone, then you know you can go back to her.
Also, this will feed into the jealousy factor of it because you'll be going around trying to talk to other women. Just glance over and see if she's watching. If she looks over and catches a glimpse at you talking to another girl then you know she's interested.
Now that we've covered some important steps you will have to put your whole act together. Be ready. Make it a fun game for yourself. Always be out there trying new things. Talking to people. Being on your feet in a conversation. All this comes with time and practice and especially some confidence.
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