We have all been there at some point in our dating relationships. It's not the inexperience of youth or the desperation of middle age. We meet someone and think that after all our relationship trials and tribulations, the relationship Gods have smiled upon us and sent us the "right" one! You can't be apart, you talk to each other six times a day if you're going to see each other that night and you talk to each other a dozen times a day if you're not.
Of course, with all the talking you are doing, it stays superficial and balanced. You try to avoid discussing the past, because no one wants to look like a loser, or you don't want the other to think you pick losers. You avoid major issues such as politics, religion, marriage and children because you don't want to come across as too serious and scare the other away. It's a tightrope and both people are walking it. Don't Ask, Don't Tell (yet) So, everyone sticks to the fun "getting to know you" questions. This relationship could continue on just fine and even lead to marriage. But, at some point, you find out he used to be a cocaine addict or she is violent when she is angry, and hurts puppies.
The circle of failing relationships can be stopped by asking your new (or married) partner the right questions. I don't mean questions like "tacos or pizza", or "are you a cat or a dog person". Although these may be good "ice breaker" questions, they are NOT life altering questions. People are always surprised down the road when they find out WHAT THEY DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT THE OTHER PERSON! They realize they would have never gone out with that person if they knew of a particular thing in the "beginning". Relationships fail because people don't REALLY know the person they are with. By asking the right questions you can decide if that person is actually who they portrayed themselves to be.
"1000 Questions For Couples" can stop these surprises from happening. It's fine to ask the fun questions, but there are questions that are an absolute must for dating and out of these 1000 Questions there are at least 700 questions that are crucial for married or engaged couples to discuss as well. The most important thing in any relationship or marriage is actually "knowing" your partner. Being able to ask each other the right questions helps your relationship open up, with honest emotions and allows the other person to be honest and open as well. By finding out the truly important things about each other helps create the trust and the foundation for love and the long lasting relationship you are looking for. You could actually save a marriage or relationship by finding out that one thing you do is an absolute turn off for your partner. Or you could find out that something they do or believe is just not acceptable for you under any circumstances.
Save yourself the wasted time of finding things out later that you should have known early in the relationship. Don't be afraid to ask the important questions...the relationship altering questions.
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