Dating can be a really confusing subject for a lot of you. Not only are the rules illusive, you also have to weigh up all the conflicting opinions of what should and shouldn't be done.
My job is to make it easy for you to clear out all the junk and get down to what's most important when it comes to attracting a woman - and in this case getting a girlfriend.
So, this is for you - the simple guy. And, all you need to remember is the 3 Fs. You have to find her, filter out the bad ones, and finalize (in other words seal the deal!)
Let me explain...
Find her
You are not going to get a girlfriend by sitting on the couch waiting for a gorgeous girl to knock on your door and ask you if she can be your girlfriend. No, no, no. You my friend, are going to need to get off your butt and (after you read this article) off the computer and out into the REAL WORLD. So do "whatever it takes" to put yourself in situations where there are available women whom you can talk to. My suggestion is to pick places that you feel comfortable in or that you have an interest in. So, if you enjoy eating out maybe you can talk to a woman in the local cafe/restaurant you frequent. If you like the outdoors maybe there is a social group where you can meet new people (and most importantly women) PLUS learn or enjoy a sport you like. Remember, just because you are single and looking for a girlfriend DOES not mean you automatically have to hit the clubs. More likely, you are going to get along well with a woman who has some shared interests as you do.
Filter, filter, filter!
Alright, so let's say you've been a good boy and now you are frequenting places where there are good quality available women. Let's say that in fact you've been on a few dates with them. So, now what? This is one of the most important steps in this process. Make sure you pick the right one to be your girlfriend. This does not mean you make the first available girl your girlfriend. It also doesn't mean that you pick the most challenging or hard to get girl and assume that she is the one you want. You have to be smart. Date a few women at a time and get to know each of them. Filter out any women that are showing potential red flags. For example, women that seem too high maintenance, emotionally erratic, or secretive, etc. I know that sometimes they seem the most appealing because they represent a challenge... but more often than not they just end up breaking your heart. So, choose wisely. And, take as long as you need to find the right one.
Finalize: Seal the deal...
So, now you have your eye on the prize. This is the woman you can feel authentic around, that makes you laugh, and whom you can share many things with. So, how do you go about it? Timing is of the essence. If you do it too soon - it can freak a woman out. And, if you delay too much - it can make her wonder if you are really "into her" at all. The most important thing to remember is that you are the one that has to lead her to this next stage of the relationship. So, when you go in to seal the deal: you have to KNOW your worth (don't be thinking that she is doing you a favor by "being" your girlfriend); gauge the overall feel of your relationship with her; and then move it to that next stage. The best way to ask her to the next stage is to imply what YOU WANT. For example, you could say something like, "I like spending time with you and I don't want to date anyone else except you". This is most comes across as most natural and proves to be most effective when you can clearly see that this woman is interested in you, loves spending time with you, and makes herself available to you. And, lastly remember: Ask for what you want and make NO apologies for it.
So, there you have it. You now know the 3 Fs on getting a girlfriend. The most important thing that you do now - is apply it!
No comments:
Post a Comment