Deal With Stress and Safeguard Your Relationship

Stress is a recognised aspect of modern life and many people find that they cope well enough unless several areas of their lives become stressful all at the same time. Work often brings its own pressures due to several requirements; the need to be seen to do a good job, satisfy one's boss, hit increasingly impossible targets and deliver a high calibre performance. Many people find that they work longer and harder than ever before.

Wanting to enjoy a good relationship and a settled personal life can sometimes add to the pressure, as starting a new relationship, regular dating and then supporting an established relationship all needs time, attention and commitment. Time, effort and good humour are needed to look after and maintain a positive relationship with a partner.

Life's many stresses can, over time impact on health, patience, wellbeing and ultimately something has to give. Often personal relationships are the one area that end up being neglected as they are seen as being easier to relegate and negotiate with. They get whatever energy and goodwill is left over after all other areas have been attended to.

But your personal relationship with your partner is potentially the main area of support in your life. Your partner is the person who sees you at the end of a busy day, who loves you, cares about your health and happiness. It's important to protect that relationship. Let's look at some important ways that you can deal with stress and safeguard your relationship:

- Start as you mean to go on is an important commitment to make. If you are busy and have only a limited amount of time available for your new relationship it is best to be honest and clear from the outset. Many people are eager to impress a potential new partner but promising more that you can comfortably deliver is a recipe for heartbreak and disaster. Be clear so that you are both aware of each other's situation and are prepared to respect and work around that.

- Communicate how you are feeling. A relationship can become stressful if one person feels that they can't say how they are feeling or are unable to due to fear and anxiety at how their words will be received. Refuse to be intimidated, insist on communicating your thoughts and feelings and be firm and clear about your point of view.

- Set aside time for your relationship. If you'd booked an important client in your diary you would not cancel unless something really urgent came up. Treat your relationship in the same way. Value it and allow it to be an important part of your happiness. When you enjoy quality time together you and your relationship both benefit.

- Say 'no' sometimes. All relationships require give and take but saying 'no' means that the other person has at times to stop and consider you and your feelings. Many relationships survive indefinitely with one dominant person always making the decisions. There sometimes comes a time in these relationships, when the other person suddenly has had enough and decides to walk away. A less extreme approach is work on personal confidence levels, deal with stress by deciding what you want to do and, if necessary at times saying 'no'.

Dealing with stress effectively means allowing as many parts of your life as possible to provide support, relaxation and comfort. Open and honest communication supports your relationship, enabling it to become an important, positive part of your life. And managing stress, being better humoured, treating your partner with love and respect is the best way to safeguard your relationship.

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