Friday, January 4, 2013

How to Survive a Break Up?

The extended family or peripherals.

A man may not choose the family that he is born in but he sure does choose the friends that he hangs out with. The choice of friends depends on common interests, hobbies, passion and other things that can be common. In other words, as discussed above friends are his extended family and to a certain extent they are a reflection of him and his thinking and his habits. Yet they are not all the same. Just like his habits. Some you would like and some you would dislike. That does not mean for certain that he is all good or all bad. Remember you chose him in spite of knowing his pitfalls.

It is the same with his friends. Some will be good and some you may dislike. However, imagine how difficult it would be for your partner to realize that you see no good in the people he so strongly cares for. Just be there for him. You may not share things in common with his extended family, but you can go with the flow. Just be there with him. After all that is exactly what you wanted. You are with him because of him not his friends.

Besides, once you are imbibed into the circle you will always be in on everything. They would also notice all the efforts that you have put into the relationship and vouch for you. It is not possible to like everyone immediately, therefore, it would be advisable to put yourself in his shoes and see his friends as he does. That would make things easier.

Not everyone is the same. The world could not function if all the people were alike. Open-minded is the key. You were open-minded that is why you fell in love with him in the first place. Like him, everyone has an upside and downside, even his friends. There ought to be some good in them. All you need to do is keep your eyes open.

Appreciate the others life.

His friends are just an extension of him and his thinking. To realize this fact is one thing and to implement it is another. If you do not value his friends, an indirect implication is that you do not value him and his thinking. If you value him he will value you. One of the major reasons for not liking the others friends is that they seem like pirates who so ruthlessly rob you of the time that you could spend with each other. Well it is not so, remember he is the one who has chosen his friends. The next time he wishes to spend some time with his friends, let him, no strings attached. If you can believe it, he will be thinking of you, after all that is human nature. If he wishes you could also accompany him. And if he specially asks you to accompany him with his buddies then make sure you take out some time. Remember, whatever you do, he will reciprocate. If you are willing to do so much to get involved in his world, he will do the same for you. Wouldn't that be awesome?

Be a friend to his friends and also a friend to his friend's friend.

If you think you know him better than anyone else, think again. His friends probably have been with him longer than you have. At least a few of them are bound to be his childhood accomplices. If they are then you are in luck. You could get a firsthand account of his childhood experiences. Of course do not sound too prying. Talks about his ex-girls need to be kept low since they are a bit too personal. You could ask things about his school days. They would be a good help if you are planning a surprise for him on any special occasion.

Success stories have been written where women were able to make one group from two. The end was sweet love which was based on friendship. A world of new possibilities opens up with new acquaintances and this is your chance.

Show a little excitement and a little excitement will show you wonders. A little effort on your part can make the bud of love bloom into a sweet fragrant flower that would last forever.

Your appreciation of his life and friends, in other words, his world would go a long way if you are really committed and want the relationship to work. An invitation to your party would hardly make a difference to you but would make him and his friends feel good. So invite them to your parties. It is not all that difficult.

Try to get to know them better, they are not that bad. But do not lose yourself, trying to be someone who you are not so be yourself. Eventually everything does pan out and fall into place. Soon, you will see how you can make a completely new world of acquaintances from one person.



This article is brought to you by MATCH.

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